I've been in a tenure-track faculty position for a year and a half now, and lately I've been a bit disoriented by feeling proud of my students.
In my ten years of teaching, I've consistently had classes filled with bright and interesting students who do quality work. But my knowledge of them only lasted for one term-- I was a grad student teaching first year writing; I didn't get to know students any longer than that.
In my time at USAO, though, I've gotten to know a number of students for a longer period of time and in a variety of contexts. In addition to working with students in the classroom, I get to know students in the Writing Center (which I direct), and in the Lit Club (which I advise). So even though a year and a half isn't a terribly long time to get to know someone, given all the opportunities I have to spend time with the same students, I do get to know a lot about these individuals in contexts beyond their roles as students in classes I teach.
Sometime in the middle of this past term, I noticed myself feeling quite clearly proud of many of the students I've gotten to know, and I felt a bit uncomfortable with the sensation. The discomfort comes in part from a lack of familiarity with the emotion. I'm not a parent, and my cat hardly does anything remarkable, so I haven't had many chances to feel pride before.
There's something to my discomfort that's a little harder to articulate, though. I can't quite unwind pride from condescension-- in order to feel proud of someone, I think you must feel somehow superior (in skill, knowledge, or experience). I have always tried to teach more as a facilitator encouraging individual inquiry than as an expert dispensing knowledge to the ignorant. While I do retain a teacherly authority in the classroom, I try very hard to not place myself as a superior-- I don't feel particularly comfortable there, and I don't think it's pedagogically effective. Though I've certainly had people proud of me in my life, I've also been particularly quick to react negatively to condescension-- I do not like to be patronized (who does?).
Perhaps I'm worried that the students of whom I am proud will read my pride as condescension. I hope that's never the case.
Oh, but mostly, the experience of being proud is quite pleasant. I recommend it.
In my ten years of teaching, I've consistently had classes filled with bright and interesting students who do quality work. But my knowledge of them only lasted for one term-- I was a grad student teaching first year writing; I didn't get to know students any longer than that.
In my time at USAO, though, I've gotten to know a number of students for a longer period of time and in a variety of contexts. In addition to working with students in the classroom, I get to know students in the Writing Center (which I direct), and in the Lit Club (which I advise). So even though a year and a half isn't a terribly long time to get to know someone, given all the opportunities I have to spend time with the same students, I do get to know a lot about these individuals in contexts beyond their roles as students in classes I teach.
Sometime in the middle of this past term, I noticed myself feeling quite clearly proud of many of the students I've gotten to know, and I felt a bit uncomfortable with the sensation. The discomfort comes in part from a lack of familiarity with the emotion. I'm not a parent, and my cat hardly does anything remarkable, so I haven't had many chances to feel pride before.
There's something to my discomfort that's a little harder to articulate, though. I can't quite unwind pride from condescension-- in order to feel proud of someone, I think you must feel somehow superior (in skill, knowledge, or experience). I have always tried to teach more as a facilitator encouraging individual inquiry than as an expert dispensing knowledge to the ignorant. While I do retain a teacherly authority in the classroom, I try very hard to not place myself as a superior-- I don't feel particularly comfortable there, and I don't think it's pedagogically effective. Though I've certainly had people proud of me in my life, I've also been particularly quick to react negatively to condescension-- I do not like to be patronized (who does?).
Perhaps I'm worried that the students of whom I am proud will read my pride as condescension. I hope that's never the case.
Oh, but mostly, the experience of being proud is quite pleasant. I recommend it.
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